Peace

There is peace in the space between and breath in the stones
There is sun in your lungs and song in your bones.

Fly Away, An Ode To Shadows

The moon’s white eyes see everything

She smiles silverly down on miles of darkened green.

(Sometimes I think the night is even darker than what we can see)

sometimes (I think) the light gets lost for years before it sees the sea

Sometimes I find lost patches of the gray and black, like glass in me.

I stare up to the dome of sky, I offer up a salty cry, I lick lost lips, kiss fingertips.

And find my broken home within.

I curse the night and nurse my hips

I clutch the wheel and glance at cold eternity

She stares her silver eyes right back at me-

The mirrored ceiling of the sky is laughing and bending,

It watches firey tears and lovers lie, as all-everything unravels, to coil back to One.

 

I travel up a lonely mountain, I fill my cup up with the sun

I shout up to the emptiness

And lay down my lost tongue

I find the first foot on the ladder

And I start to climb the rungs

 

The veil is lifted

 

sand is sifted

 

The sea is gifted to the ground now.

 

I am lost and I am found now.

 

I belong to the sea glass,

Scraping itself smooth

On the ocean floor.

I belong to the sand dunes and

To the fire at the core

 

I belong to twisted grace and this place could never hold my space for long.

In haste,

I untie all my prayers and untether my blessings

I pray my soul up to the air and spread out in all directions

I float all up, up and away, and they never find a body

I peak through rain clouds in the day

And cherry pick through star clusters in the darkey-dark.

My teeth are stars strung across the ceiling

I sew the lights, the blackness healing.

The sky’s a lavish tapestry sewn up with all the threads of me.

 

((There’s a side of empty that you never see))

And there’s a pitch black-black within the sun (the darkey-dark of everyone).

 

 

It sinks: everything.

 

The sun and the moon go their different ways now,

And suddenly, there’s no one here.

But the women’s wombs are here to stay now

 

And the earth is pregnant with seeds.

Resuscitate

I held my fresh wounds to your ear

Like an ocean shell

So you could hear

All the nuances of hell in which I dwelled

You licked both blood and brine

Untangled battered twine

Unfolded tampered cloth

And held your lips to mine.

Prayer To Mother Isis

Dance with me

O sacred one

I will make an altar of the souls of my feet

And slice open the web of silence

 

Dance with me

O ancient one

I will hold the space for all the fallen stars

To crawl out of the mud and hug open the bright new dawn

 

Dance with me

Oh mother moon

I will fashion a drum of my heart

 

Dance with me

Oh, fill my womb

With sacred beats

And untold wings.

 

Let all the ravens unfold across my sun-bleached bones

 

Let all the cats stretch out across my soul.

 

Mark me, scathe me, make me whole

 

Let us catch all the tears in the sacred bowl,

And offer them up to the center

 

Queen ISIS I evoke you

 

Rub the mud from the mirror

Take us home to the shared soul

Where we will see clearer

We will dance the story untold

And make right the ripe unfolding.

We will Tether back the great umbilicus

And sing the song of remembrance.

 

We will feed the field of golden fruit again.

We will flow and we will ebb

The stars will fall into the web

We offer up our holy hands and the salt from our eyes

The story never ends

And the ink never dries /////

They Came

They marched through biting cold and frozen mold with a halos of stars

strung right-round

the Sogging heads

they carried through the rain

 

Through the forest they came

Dancing through a thicket of stars

To tap their slender fingers up against my window pane

 

‘Til cracks spread like lace and spider web

 

Shadowing my face and tearing into my head

 

My window fell like icicles onto the forest floor

 

My face was naked

Cold and famous among the brush and all the nameless leaves

 

The slender fingers lingering, uncurled to me

My eyes were frozen shut but in the dark room of the nighttime I could see

 

The slender slice of moon bobbing; a buoy in the trees

 

The kiss of your lips and the swoon of your knees

 

Your opal eyes as you returned to me

With arms outstretched like galaxies.

You Will Go On A Great Journey

I rolled past honey drenched hills

And fields sewn of golden soma

Under windows of the sky,

Beneath her eye,

I always wandered.

 

Unspooling golden twine,

My wound-up spooled spine-

Unwinding in its time.

(always I wandered).

Between great wheels with ivory arms, holding up the sky

I swam down rivers and snakes of tar, always beneath her eye.

Against the coast, I tasted ocean brine,

Sneaking like a small dream

Between these lips of mine….

 

I lost my train of thought

And fought the tears I sought

Between lost mounds

With tales of death

 

(their flowers spoke of resurrection.)

 

 

I rolled past painted signs with half dead faces pointing me in all directions.

Bold gods of many millennia frowned, sienna and umber up from the ground, their regal chins jutting into child-bearing towns,

And when I gave them my tears, they gave me the sound of the stream, crystalline, gurgling up from the mound.

 

(Everything is a cycle, child.)

 

between sties and silos,

scythe’s and halos

I swam wildly

Winding golden twine into a great hawthorn nest.

 

I hooked my heart and beat my breast

 

Great birds with hooked beaks gazed down and eyed me with mild fascination as I drove myself like a stake, into some heart-somewhere.

 

I wound up and down taffy hills, and rolled through cotton candy sunsets.

 

I tarried down juniper-lined streets and rocky high roads,

 

My eyes scanned for something unknown.

 

I always wandered.

 

I found myself in books and nooks off beaten trails

In rocks and rails

I lost my sails and all my screws

My honey too,

(my honey too).

 

I burnt the map and drank the sap

 

I followed the visions.

 

I lost myself.

 

 

I always wandered.

 

 

I tore down all the golden thread, let loose the ropes that held my head

 

I sat beneath a good wide tree and silently, found me.

 

No sign could point me to this place,

 

No twine can decorate my face.

 

I salvaged fallen stars and golden grace.

 

I hollered up at empty space

 

And wandered where no one could see.

 

Beneath her twinkling eye,

 

And her lips of lullaby,

 

I read the book of me.

 

Big

I used to try to make myself so small

Like if I could fit into the cracks and crags

No one would see me

Huge and amplified

All my insecurities

All of my beauty

Would shrink along with me

And then maybe,

I wouldn’t have to be

 

So huge

 

Now, with my ideas

Now with my full moons and my love

Now with my wet eyes

Now with my thunder thighs

 

 

I used to try to shrink myself way down

A silver sliver that would slide into oblivion

Who would not have to stand at the grand podium of god and shine in golden shimmers of light and say

 

This Is Me

 

all my edges all my mounds all my might and all my insecurity

here I am, this is me, and

I am grown now

Responsible for my glory

I own my fate

And all this love flows from my hips

Again and again

 

I return

 

Larger toward the grand union, the one

Here I am

Big thighs

Wet eyes and all,

 

Here I am

 

For all to see.

 

On Leaving

When he left me, I was an uncorked bottle of primordial mud oozing down past the crust of the earth.

Flickering into earth worms and spreading my stench, like death, through millennia of dust.

I was the stuff of menstrual blood

A pre-lingual woman who squats in the dirt

Fermented heart and eyes like vinegar

Eyes like a jagged scream

 

Eyes just like no one ever knew me

 

-Eyes like the endless dunes of night….

And a mouth just as long and as loathsome as your tattered feet in flight

A Mouth as lost and hollow as the empty street light

 

That hung its heavy head like a bent (spent) poppy

and splattered shattered fragments of light across the night

Under the moon, by the river

 

The night we broke our promises.

 

When he left me, I was a shattered window pain

And the empty space of a forgotten name

 

The stars were all blinking out and it was I to blame.

 

 

 

When you met me

I was whole, as whole as can be

I was strong and miles tall but soft as a stream

And steady in my dreams

I was one woman and not half of one circle

 

 

For years that woman slipped away

Quietly

Into the nooks and crannies of your neck

But she’s come to call on you now

And tell you

 

I’m back.

 

Thighs like sledgehammers and mouth like a diamond

 

I’m back.

 

Flanked by wolves and scabs of night

 

I slip across my shadow, and tear long holes in my soul but its real and it’s me.

 

 

 

You are such a slippery thing, like a gust of wind you ripple through my hair

My fingers tare across the air but then;

 

You’re Gone.

 

I sit within the pool of my molten soul, so hot and cold.

You’re gone.

I wonder if you were ever really there at all.

 

 

This is the part where I grow strong.

 

 

New Clothing Line!

I’m thrilled to announce my new collaborative clothing line created with Sprout of Infinite Wind Designs. You can check out all of the designs on my etsy page at www.etsy.com/shop/emkell <3 clothing-line-banner-1-copy-copyadvert-1-copy

To My Future Daughter

When I first heard your heartbeat, it was drumming out across the earth

It started deep, down in red clay

And worked its way on up to birth

When I first new you were coming,

Old trees bowed their heads to me

They had held you in their roots, you see,

And couldn’t wait for us to meet!

When I first knew you were coming, the wind wept joyfully

She was an old, old friend of yours

And she had danced among the trees

For many centuries

Calling your body up from the dust and your soul down from the stars.